Wednesday, June 15, 2011

What Do You Do?

"What do you do?" It's probably the most common question to ask someone when you're making small talk or trying to get to know them. I ask new people at church that question a lot. I don't actually like the question but after I ask,  "How'd you find out about GrassRoots?," it seems like the only thing left to ask someone I don't know. 

I don't like the question because it indicates that what you do is who you are or is how you find value or something like that. You know what I mean? And that's been confirmed for me by how people answer the question. In this economy a lot of people are going back to school or working jobs they don't like or unemployed or underemployed. So when they answer the question they answer in a tone that says they're not very proud of what they do. And then I feel bad for asking. 

So my question for you is, what's a better question to ask? Is there a way to get to know someone better without asking what they do? Or just a better way to ask the question. 

4 comments:

  1. I have always hated that question too! It always seems to revolve around "work", even if you don't work anywhere.
    I often ask "So, what's your story?" but I feel it's too deep if you've just met someone. Another good option is "Tell me about yourself."

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  2. I usually ask "So are you working anywhere right now?"

    Although some people can go overboard and act like I'm assuming they are lazy and don't work? So I just ask it after I've already been doing small talk for a bit.

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  3. John, I like "tell me about yourself." I like being asked that. People, in general, I think like being asked about themselves. That's a great alternative. I agree that "What's your story" is a little deep.

    Mal, I can't believe people really get upset about that. So much for trying to be sensitive, huh?

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  4. I like 'tell me about yourself' too. I've been having that same problem lately.

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